I am not that old, still in mid 20s but somehow these romantic stories or romantic encounters of others have started boring me. I can't bear listening to people's honeymoon phase special moments, they sound immature and fake to me. Not fake may be rather not interesting. Its like been there, done that. I don't find the feeling of falling head over heels in love that promising, for god's sake it brings along anxiousness, nervousness and feeling of rejection if it doesn't go through. If I ever to get divorced, I think i will end up alone for all my life because there is nothing anyone could do to please me. I don't like flowers, I am not into food, I am not into surprise vacations, I don't care about meeting parents or marriage or proposals. Either I outgrew or just lost faith in the whole institution of falling in love, getting married and that forever after happiness. Its not from sad perspective or desperate loneliness or depression, its from stability and balance . I am happy to not be involved in romantic delusions. May be I am going crazy after all these years. Having kids is out of question for me so even that link won't work with me. Its like a dead end or perhaps new beginnings gate where everything i see is so crystal clear. Life and its parts look like all untangled. Still there are phases that leave me confuzzled and exhausted, I never try to make them work. I just don't want to be unhappy for a while to make efforts for others.
I talk to people and they are so excited about their life, their friends, their parents kids etc etc. I have nothing to look forward to, no job noone to care for. Infact sometimes I even crush people's enthu by talking to them. They are left baffled and wonder where I come from. Gossip doesn't attract me anymore, i don't want to be invovlved in any person's secret love life or their emotions. How did this happen? It could be because of lack of human contact for so long. Stopped admiring things and started looking for ways to call others not so cool. I think there are 3 stages in marriage, first when you love the person so much you can't get hands off each other, the major pda phase, the second phase when you are done with over love and start appreciating the person and showing the world you are a mature couple with no pda ridiculing young luv phase as just some rush, third phase is when we start believing what we say about love and love just gets kicked out from our lives too. Now being in love was uncool for us so we just moved on. We know each other way too better to fall in love well all over again. Its kind of painful inside.
What to do with love stories don't appeal to us? When they seem too good to be true? When we start saying- They are just kids in love, let them come to our stature of cool adjusting love. The more you adjust, the more you are expected and all the adjustment just keeps blending with normal routing invisibility. And then comes time when both the partners expect a lot and wish they had chosen someone else or waited longer to meet the right person. Soulmates we once where become mere ring exchangers.
I talk to people and they are so excited about their life, their friends, their parents kids etc etc. I have nothing to look forward to, no job noone to care for. Infact sometimes I even crush people's enthu by talking to them. They are left baffled and wonder where I come from. Gossip doesn't attract me anymore, i don't want to be invovlved in any person's secret love life or their emotions. How did this happen? It could be because of lack of human contact for so long. Stopped admiring things and started looking for ways to call others not so cool. I think there are 3 stages in marriage, first when you love the person so much you can't get hands off each other, the major pda phase, the second phase when you are done with over love and start appreciating the person and showing the world you are a mature couple with no pda ridiculing young luv phase as just some rush, third phase is when we start believing what we say about love and love just gets kicked out from our lives too. Now being in love was uncool for us so we just moved on. We know each other way too better to fall in love well all over again. Its kind of painful inside.
What to do with love stories don't appeal to us? When they seem too good to be true? When we start saying- They are just kids in love, let them come to our stature of cool adjusting love. The more you adjust, the more you are expected and all the adjustment just keeps blending with normal routing invisibility. And then comes time when both the partners expect a lot and wish they had chosen someone else or waited longer to meet the right person. Soulmates we once where become mere ring exchangers.
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